Thursday, March 17, 2011

Sometimes it is the answer.

This is young lad in the picture to the left is Casey Heynes. On March 14th of this year Casey was enjoying a beautiful morning in sunny Sydney taking a brisk walk to class. The calm of his day was broken however when he was confronted by a pack of miniature douche bags, which I believe is the technical term for school bullies. Obviously aware of the nature of these young delinquents Casey put his back to the wall (smart) and suffered through their verbal onslaught giving his offenders no quarter. 

Frustrated by Casey's steadfastness, his tormentors decided that they would not settle for a simple rattling, they wanted to shake Casey to the core. They wanted to break him. Little did they know that at the core of this pudgy little man-boy was a heart made of steel and pure unadulterated shit kicking. They had no way to know that inside of MR. Heynes was a chained beast, and not just any beast but something like an amalgam of Fenrir, Cthulu, the Hydra, and possibly every other really cool mythological beast from days of yore. 

And when one of the more brazen little dick bags stepped forward to strike poor Casey in the mouth, Casey left The Beast chained. He showed that he was the master of The Beast, he showed incredible restraint. Unfortunately for all involved his small annoying attacker, who I will now call Yappy Dog, decided to try and step up the pressure. Yappy Dog proceeded to further antagonize young Sir Casey by prancing around like a fop and poorly jabbing his fists at our hero. Concerned for his safety and seeing no end to the half baked assault Casey decided he had enough. He lunged easily through Yappy's offensive, grabbed a hold of Yappy with  a grip of steel, thrust Yappy into the air, and planted him firmly into the concrete like one would plant azaleas if one had a fierce hatred for azaleas. 

Casey had unleashed The Beast, but he did not leave it so for long. Seeing his foe sobbing lightly on the concrete, broken, defeated, and most likely severely injured, Casey took pity and re-leashed the beast. He then walked away.

If you doubt my words that such a man could live in the body of a pudgy 16 year old boy, to you I say a video is worth many words.




           

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

And you, my dear friend, thought I would not like this post. Shame on you.
And well put.
Yours,
The Idler.