Hello ladies and gentlemen, I have something to ask you, and I insist that you respond. Actually I'm going to give you a scenario and then a question, so here it is:
 |
| I would crap on that. |
You have been hiking for hours along an unfamiliar trail, when suddenly you feel the stirrings of what is possibly the most unpleasant bowel movement you will ever experience. You continue further down the trail trying to find a comfy looking out of the way spot to relieve yourself, unfortunately you can't seem to find a spot that isn't occupied by some variety of thorny vegetation. Luckily during your desperate search, you happen to spot an outhouse in the distance. You rush as fast as you can to the outhouse, open the door and rush in. You are surprised to find that the outhouse is rather clean, unusually so for an outhouse and rather pleasant smelling, and then you spot a sign right next to the toilet paper dispenser. The sign reads, "Below you in the hole lies the cleaned and polished bones of Ayn Rand, famed author." You are surprised by what you read, but regardless of your surprise you still need to defecate. Yet you know that you have just enough time to get outside to evacuate your bowels in a nearby blackberry bush. What do you do? Take the biggest bender of your life over the Earthly remains of Ayn Rand in comfort and privacy, or jump into the black berry bush and try your luck?
I would say screw it and drop the kids off at The Ayn Rand Community Center pool.
1 comment:
From an Objectivist viewpoint, I *should* take the dump on Ayn Rand's bones because it's the most efficient use of available resources. Also I really hate Ayn Rand. You'd have to give me a pretty compelling reason *not* to shit on those bones.
Post a Comment